Do I Still Matter?: Coaching a Comeback

“How much do I still matter?“

That’s the quiet fear behind so many career comebacks. Rarely spoken directly, it shows up in coded language:

“I’m just trying to get my footing again.”

“I know I’ve been out of the loop.”

“I hope I haven’t lost momentum.”

Sometimes people return to a new company or a new role. Just as often, they return to the same position—same desk, same boss, same email address—but nothing feels the same.

Underneath it all is something heavier: Has work moved on without me?

Re-entering after a career break can feel like walking into a strategy meeting where the language changed, the alliances shifted, and your old seat was quietly filled. Even when it’s technically still yours, the question lingers: Will they still see me as relevant?

As coaches, we know this isn’t just a job re-entry. It’s a psychological and emotional one.

What clients need most in this moment isn’t a pep talk or a checklist. It’s permission to feel the loss, to reframe the story, and to show up now: older, wiser, evolved, and very much worthy of influence.

Here are two client stories, Maya and Luis, that show how returning to the same or similar roles often requires deeper internal recalibration.

Maya: Reclaiming Her Path to VP

Maya, a Filipino-American woman, was on the short list for VP at a healthcare tech company before taking a four-year break to care for her toddler and her father with Parkinson’s. When she returned, it was to the same company and same title—Associate Director—but everything felt different.

“I know I didn’t lose my edge,” she told me. “But I can feel myself shrinking in meetings. Like I’m waiting for someone to validate that I still belong.”

Colleagues were friendly. But the stretch assignments went elsewhere. The whispers about “ramping back up” stung. She started wondering if her career momentum was quietly being rerouted without a conversation.

In coaching, we focused on three things: rebuilding her voice and leadership presence, reframing caregiving as leadership experience, and reclaiming agency in how she asked for visibility and stretch projects.

We replaced the default “grateful re-entry” narrative with something more honest and powerful:

“The last few years sharpened how I lead—through complexity, care systems, and urgent decisions. I’m not just back. I’m operating from a deeper lens. Here’s where I want to contribute now.”

Within six months, Maya negotiated a new team structure and was named interim VP for a new initiative. She didn’t wait to be re-anointed. She showed up as someone already leading.

Luis: Returning With Power to the Same Firm

Luis, a Colombian-born strategy consultant, had been on track for Associate Partner at a global professional services firm when his family relocated to the U.S. for his wife’s new role. He took a planned leave of absence to support the transition. What started as 12 months turned into five years.

When he returned, it was to the same firm and the same job title. But the energy was different.

“It’s like everyone sees me as ‘that guy who took a break,’” he said. “No one says it out loud, but I can feel it.”

He was welcomed back with polite emails and light onboarding. But the high-stakes clients were going to someone else. The question wasn’t whether he could still do the work. It was whether he was still seen as someone worth betting on.

Our work focused on reframing his leadership value, rebuilding visibility with authenticity, and resetting boundaries so he didn’t overcompensate through constant over-functioning.

Instead of shrinking to fit back in, Luis chose to re-enter with clarity:

“My time away expanded my leadership lens. I’m not looking to catch up. I’m here to lead from a steadier, more human place. I’ve seen what burnout costs. I’m not here to perpetuate it. I’m here to build differently.”

He’s now leading a transformation program across Latin America and the U.S., and he’s been nominated—again—for Associate Partner. The break didn’t stall him. It shaped him.

What These Stories Reveal

Whether clients are returning to something new or something familiar, the experience is rarely straightforward. Coaching during this transition often centers on:

• The fear of irrelevance. Even returning to the same role can feel destabilizing. We help clients reconnect with their voice and their value, especially when no one is questioning them aloud but they’re questioning themselves internally.
• The pressure to be quiet and grateful. Many returners, especially caregivers, women, and people of color, feel pressure to “not make waves.” Coaching helps them stop shrinking to stay safe and start expanding to stay true.
• Narrative ownership.A career break isn’t a detour. It’s part of the leadership arc. We help clients integrate that story with authority and pride.
• Same role doesn’t mean same dynamics.Even if the job title hasn’t changed, expectations have. Clients need support renegotiating their place, their energy, and their self-advocacy.

Coaching Questions That Reopen Possibility

• How would you show up if you didn’t feel the need to “make up for lost time”?
• What would you say about your break if you believed people would see the value in it?
• Are you operating from fear of being forgotten or from clarity about who you are now?
• What are you tolerating now that you wouldn’t have accepted before the break?

Whether they’re walking back into familiar spaces or carving out new ones, returning professionals aren’t just looking for work. They’re looking to be seen again.

And maybe that’s the real invitation—not just to return, but to return with more clarity, more self-trust, and a different kind of power.

You don’t have to be new to be worthy. You don’t have to be perfect to be seen.

Maybe the question isn’t “Do I still matter?”

Maybe it is, “Am I finally ready to show up as I am?”